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..I couldn’t describe exactly what it smelled like, but it did remind me of someone. Some lover who’s name may be forgotten, but her smell, her taste, her warmth were not.Tentatively I popped the flower in my mouth. Disappointing to be honest, no lover’s remembrance here, really no real taste at all. Not the outcome I wanted, but a brief snack. My stomach wanted some food, but I was going to wait until at least getting past the ford of the Lesser Jules until I would stop for lunch.From the looks of it the Jules wasn’t that far away at this point anyway. The Jules River was the main waterway that cut through the country, connecting most of the major cities and towns. The Lesser Jules was a tributary that passed nearest to Terrydale before meeting with the Jules proper nearer to Hollygate. I even passed most of a season as a ferryman at the Hollygate crossing once. It was good, honest work. I met interesting people, heard some interesting stories, and met a few...charmers that way. This. There are people who will love you, who will like you, who won't give a rat's ass about you, and there are people who will hate your guts. The only way everyone's gonna love you is if you make them. And you keep saying that you don't want to do that. Well then, fine ... don't. But stop using it as an excuse to not use your abilities to their fullest extent and your utmost ability. Stop using it as an excuse to run away from the mess you've made of your life."I didn't run away. I'm doing what I can to protect them from my lack of control."Yeah, right. Say it often enough and you might even start to believe it. They need you and you ran away. You couldn't deal with feeling rejected and betrayed so you ran. Good thinking. What about your children? How are they gonna feel? Abandoned and rejected maybe? Responsible for whatever it is that's happening? Little kids think the entire world revolves around them, so QED, right? Don't you love any of them? Or has one rough spot in your path.
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